Archive for the 'Bike It' Category

Lance Armstrong just can't catch a break.

SCA Promotions, an insurance company in Dallas, Texas, is suing Lance over bonuses paid to him after winning the Tour de France.

The lawsuit said:

For a man that doesn't really take anything seriously, Conan O'Brien sure does take cycling seriously!!

We mean, just look at him: he's got the determination, the helmet, and the entire body suit!

THAT'S what we call dedication to a physical activity!

We suppose that not everything can be fun and games all the time — so maybe this is just his "serious" outlet. You know, where gets all the seriousness out of him for a little bit each day so he can spend the rest on the top of his comedy game! LOLz!

Either way, we're glad to see him out staying active!

[Image via Ramey Pix.]

Okay, this is just getting ridiculous now. Either string him up or let him be.

Lance Armstrong is apparently at the center of a new federal criminal investigation.

Even though we just reported it seems like he's off the hook, it turns out that that might not be the case!

Lance Armstrong probably just breathed a sigh of relief for the first time in a very long time.

An attorney who was overseeing the federal investigation into Lance said that his public admission that he used performance-enhancing drugs doesn't change anything.

He said:

Making it into Madame Tussauds, the famous wax museum, is a great feat.

It means you're one of the top celebs in pop culture!

That honor belonged to Lance Armstrong.

Now that he's fallen into disgrace and admitted to cheating his way to his seven Tour de France wins, things are crumbling around Armstrong.

He will not be losing his wax figure, but his caption is being reworded at Madame Tussauds Hollywood to no longer reference his "seven world titles."

If you read Lance Armstrong's books and were inspired by the true-story accounts, we bet you're feeling pretty foolish right now. He lied, and those books should totally be moved to the fiction section of the library!

The question is, though… are you feeling like such a fool that you're willing to SUE him over it??

Daaaaaaamn!

Just when you think a scandal is going to ONLY be about one high profile sports star, you get hit with a second scandal involving his famous musician love who had to have been hiding this illegal information!!

Cray!

The only problem is that despite Lance having come forward and confessing… Sheryl Crow ain't confessing shizz.