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No! Not Christopher Robin! Find Out Why Winnie The Pooh Might Have To Make A Few Visits To Prison HERE!

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Deep in the Hundred Acre Wood where Christopher Robin KILLS!

A man from Port Neches, Texas with the same name as Winnie the Pooh's boyish ward just got convicted for the 2007 murder of his roommate, Wayne Beavers.

He was just sentenced to 56 years (talk about a little black rain cloud), which might give him some time to read the works of A. A. Milne.

Poor Pooh bear though. First, Eeyore has to go to rehab for an addiction to tranquilizers, and now this? Okay, so maybe THAT didn't happen, but it's still a possibility.

Maybe Gopher will try to Shawshank Christopher out of the big house honey pot?!

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[Image via Twitter.]

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Los Angeles Sushi Chefs Plead Guilty To Buying And Selling Illegal Whale Meat At Restaurant That Prided Itself In Torturing Animals!!

Los Angeles sushi chefs plead guilty to buying and selling illegal whale meat out of a Santa Monica restuarant!

Kiyoshiro Yamamoto and Susumu Ueda are two sushi chefs who plead guilty to a pretty serious crime in the world of seafood: buying and selling illegal whale meat!

The chefs were previously employed by the now shut down Santa Monica restaurant The Hump.

The two chefs each plead guilty to three misdemeanor charges in exchange for

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Scott Thorson, AKA Matt Damon's Character In Behind The Candelabra, Facing Up To 20 Years In Prison!

Scott Thorson arrested Matt Damon's Behind the Candelabra character.

Uh-oh! Trouble for Liberace's former lover!

Scott Thorson, also known as the character Matt Damon played opposite Michael Douglas in Behind the Candelabra, is facing up to 20 years in prison!

SAY WHAAAAT!

Reportedly, Washoe District Judge Patrick Flanagan had suspended a prison sentence for Scott back in July after a frantic plea for "another chance" from the troubled man.

However, on January 21st, the judge officially sentenced Scott after he

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Butt Doctor Imposter Scoots Her Way Into Prison! Find Out How Long She'll Be Behind Bars!

Filed under: Icky Icky PooLegal MattersHealthMedicineScary!

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Oneal Ron Morris. That's a name we'll never forget writing about!

Back in 2011, she decided to perform unlicensed procedures on a number of women in the form of toxic BUTT INJECTIONS. The mixture was a combo of cement, super glue, mineral oil and Fix-A-Flat tire inflator and sealant.

Well, after pleading guilty last year, it sounds like she started her prison sentence Tuesday, and butts everywhere can rest easy (in a chair or something) that Oneal isn't out there to convince you to have an unlicensed procedure at a fraction of a cost of the real thing.

Who would go for that anyway??

She'll spend

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ESPN Decides To Air Overly Religious Ad After All

Filed under: TV NewsZportzHolidaze

When Christmas time rolls around there are many children at SSM Cardinal Glennon Children's Medical Center that can't go home.

Thousands of community members write messages of hope to the children staying there, which to us, sounds like a beautiful program.

ESPN thought so too because they shared the organization's commercial onto their network, but there was an issue…

They specifically included the sentence,

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Lauryn Hill To Skip Out On Part Of Home Detention For Concert Tour!

Filed under: Legal MattersLauryn Hill

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Lauryn Hill is the master of evasion!

Having just been released from the slammer for tax evasion, Lauryn recently began three months of home detention, but now she wants to evade some of her sentence to go on tour!

Too bad justice is justice, right? What's that? A judge actually agreed to let her go? Oh, well, good news for Lauryn AND her fans, we guess!

Lauryn will be given a pass to go to a set of

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Fat Joe Turns Himself Into Jail For Tax Evasion!

Filed under: Music MinuteLegal MattersBusted!

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And for Fat Joe's next magic trick, he turned himself into…jail! Hmm well, that was anti-climactic, and hardly magical.

Fat Joe officially checked himself into the custody of the Federal Detention Center in Miami today, where he will serve the next 4 months!

Pro: it's in Miami! Yay! Con: it's a jail in Miami. Boo!

As we reported earlier, the rapper pleaded guilty to shortchangin' the IRS over $1 millon (cue: Dr. Evil laugh) in taxes during the years of 2007 and 2008.

In addition to those 4 months, which was reduced down from a two year sentence, Fat Joe will have to play a $15,000 fine, and face a one-year supervised release.

And more likely than not, he'll have to sign up for a membership to turbotax.com.

We hope these next four months make Fat Joe realize that although filing your taxes can be a pain, it's an even bigger one not to do it. Unfortunately, unlike Monopoly, there is no Get Out Of Jail Free card.

[Image via Eyeworks Production/WENN.]

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