There is little as heartbreaking as this.
Ashley Cain and his partner Safiyya Vorajee have started planning their late daughter Azaylia’s funeral, and the process is way more brutal than they had imagined. Two weeks after saying goodbye to their sweet girl, who succumbed to her battle with leukemia at 8 months old, The Challenge star shared an update to his Instagram Thursday.
He admitted:
“I always dreaded the first time I’d have to plan a funeral. But I never thought it would be my own child’s funeral.”
Related: Ashley Cain Fans Spot Late Daughter’s Face In The Sky Above Him! Look!
How emotional! Especially considering how heartbroken the athlete has been these days, we can’t imagine having to sit down and make difficult decisions about a memorial service. For his daughter, the 30-year-old has persisted through the pain, as he continued:
“Nothing could have prepared me for this. Some days it breaks me and I can’t even bare to do it. I always thought I was [tough], but making decisions on how I’m going to bury my baby is enough to bring me to my knees every single time.”
Tragically, the father noted:
“It’s hard to make sense of anything right now, especially why did it have to happen this way!”
We feel that, too. It really is so hard to understand why things happen the way they do sometimes — and in Azaylia’s case, this outcome was certainly not fair. On her own social media page, Safiyya was reflecting on similarly sorrowful thoughts, posting a somber selfie along with a letter to her late child, saying:
“My days are so empty without you when ever I think of you I ache from head to toe as I miss you so much. I get the biggest lump in my throat And I just want to fall to my knees n cry. But then I think about what Azaylia would do.”
In another upload (below), the Brit shared:
“You are my hero My guardian Angel. Your [sic] looking from heaven & I will make you proud I will keep your name spoke forever Azaylia diamond cain.”
Azaylia died on April 24 after fighting “a very rare and aggressive form” of leukemia since she was just weeks old. The parents posted extensively about her health journey online, rallying a support system that even raised funds for the cancer patient to receive a stem-cell transplant. Sadly, the baby’s condition worsened before the procedure could take place, and Cain and Vorajee announced that Azaylia had been given “days to live.”
Last week, The Ex on The Beach alum thanked followers for their unending support. Deeply grieving the loss of his firstborn, the TV personality wrote:
”I wanted to take this time to give thanks for all the love, care and support for Azaylia throughout her battle and still now for us as a family.”
He concluded the emotional post:
“I am broken and hurting more and more everyday right now.”
We can only imagine… The way these parents continue to honor Azaylia in everything they do — even by using her strength and bravery as motivation to work through their own grief — is incredibly inspiring. We wish them luck and peace as they continue to plan their angel’s funeral.
[Image via Ashley Cain/Instagram]