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Man Stole $165,000 Worth Of Gold By Smuggling It In His BUTT! And He Almost Got Away With It…

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A+ for effort, eh!

In a story that proves the U.S. isn't the only crazy country in North America of Canada, a former Royal Canadian Mint employee named Leston Lawrence (above) smuggled $165,000 worth of gold out of his place of employment between 2014 and 2015.

In his BUTT!

Related: These Drug-Smuggling Ladies Did WHAT?!

Before we get to the nitty gritty of this butt-tastic tale, it helps to understand exactly how Lawrence got all this gold to stuff up his hiney.

According to a report, the creative perp's job entailed purifying

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Kate Middleton Continues To Dazzle In Red At A British Columbia Reception!

Kate Middleton wows in red!

Kate Middleton pulled out a whole new wardrobe for the royal tour of Canada with Prince William and their two kiddos!

A day after showing off in a new Alexander McQueen dress, the Duchess of Cambridge looked breathtaking in red at a reception held by the Province of British Columbia on Monday night.

Are U living for this look or what??

Video: Prince George Adorably Leaves Canadian Prime Minister Hanging!

The royal was stunning in a beautiful Preen by Thornton Bregazzi cocktail dress, which had Queen Elizabeth II's diamond maple leaf brooch on full display!

Red Gianvitto Rossi pumps, Soru earrings, and a chic chignon finished off the perfectly polished ensem!

We expected nothing less from Kate, and we're sure we'll be seeing more AH-mazing looks from her in the very near future.

[Image via Bauer Griffin Online.]

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Watch Prince George Leave Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau Hanging After The Politician Asks For A High Five!

This is SOOOO funny!!!

The British royal family is in Canada this weekend for an official goodwill visit, and Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau greeted them as they arrived on the plane in the city of Victoria, British Columbia.

The only problem was, well, Prince George was NOT feeling the Prime Minister!

LOLz!!

Related: Will & Kate Are Reportedly Planning For Baby #3!

After saying hello to Prince William and Princess Kate, Trudeau got down on a knee to say hi to Prince George, and offered up his hand for a high five with the little man.

In the video (above), you can see

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Teacher Suspended For Telling Student To 'Lick Me Where I Fart'

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How is this even real??

A teacher in Canada is in huge trouble with her school after making a number of legitimately filthy comments to her students including, yes, telling one kid to "lick me where I fart."

Jennifer Elizabeth Green-Johnson, who teaches at Dunnville Secondary School in Ontario, is being investigated for making a number of potty-mouthed comments to her 10th-12th grade students over the past year, and is now set for a disciplinary hearing on September 23.

Related: Corey Feldman Opens Up About Pedophilia In Hollywood

She's been docked for a month without pay already, and this is not the first time she's been reprimanded, punished, or outright suspended for inappropriate actions in the classroom, according to the Brantford Expositor.

This most recent time may end up being the most serious, though, as the school board has the ability to fire her — and they may do so because of the "lick me where I fart" comment as well as a bunch of other inappropriate things she's done.

That includes calling one student

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Judge Apologizes For Asking Rape Victim Why She 'Couldn’t Keep Her Knees Together' — But Will He Still Lose His Job?!

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It's despicable that a judge would even say this in the first place.

A Canadian federal judge has finally apologized two years after making a horrible comment to a rape victim during a trial — but now he's in some VERY serious trouble over it.

Related: Stanford Rapist Brock Turner Released After Just 3 Months

Robin Camp initially made international headlines back in 2014 during the trial itself, a case that centered on a 19-year-old woman accusing a Calgary man of raping her during a house party.

At times during that trial, according to media reports, Camp referred to the woman as "the accused," which is… weird… and he also said this to her, which is downright horrifying:

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Hacked Traffic Sign Gives Drivers Crazy NSFW Messages — Road Closed Due To Zombie WHAT?!

Filed under: CanadialandOops!HIGHlariousFunnyInstagramViral: News

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Look out ahead for zombie d*ck!

Residents of a small town in Canada driving down a local road on Monday noticed something very inneresting flashing on a road closure sign — and now, officials are left to figure out what happened!

Related: Malia Obama Closes Out Wild Summer With A Bong!

A traffic sign on the city of Stittsville's Hazeldean Road was apparently hacked, and some bad guy posted a sketchy warning of a throng of zombies — er, well, zombie d*cks!

No, really!

Ch-ch-check out d*cktastic video of the NSFW sign taken yesterday (below):

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Twitter Goes Crazy About Germany's Very Unfortunately Named Men's Field Hockey Members At The Rio Olympics!

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Wonder if these guys have ever heard this joke before…

Germany's men's field hockey team is trying to win a medal at the Olympics in Rio this month, but virtually everybody on Twitter and everywhere else is so much more concerned with, uh, this.

Related: Australia's Rowing Coaches Robbed At Knifepoint!

Two players on Germany's team — Linus Butt and Florian Fuchs — were caught on camera Saturday afternoon in a very unfortunately-timed shot during the team's game against Canada and, well, you can just see what's going on (above)!

LOLz!!!

Predictably, social media went berserk about the pairing, with many users tweeting about it (below):

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