We Saw This One Coming Months Ago!

Jessica “Don’t Call Me Latina” Alba has dumped Cashole Warren!
Us Weekly is reporting that the Fantastic Four actress broke up with her boyfriend of two years via phone last week.
By phone??? After two years? Cold!
Within hours of their convo, Alba had dispatched an assistant to the L.A. home they shared to pack up Warren’s belongings and move him out. Major biyatch!!!
Cashole must be devastated. His meal ticket is gone!
The breakup “happened…almost out of nowhere,” a source tells Us. “[Cash] thinks its for another guy but doesn’t know….he’s totally devastated. But it was all her.”
Poor Cashole. He’ll actually have to wait to get into clubs now, like all losers should.