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Lindsay Lohan Denies Poppin' Bottles Last Night: 'That Was NOT Me' At The Club!

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We just don't know what to think!

Despite all reports to the contrary, Lindsay Lohan swears she never tried sneaking into a happening Hollywood club HOURS after a judge sentenced her to rehab and cautioned her to cool her jets!

The trouble starlet took to Twitter a few minutes ago and firmly denied eye-witness testimony saying she hid outside AV Nightclub last night in the back of an SUV!

Hmmm… That optimistic little LiLo fan deep in our heart of hearts who holds out hope Lindz will one day recapture her wholesomely magnificent Mean Girls quality desperately wants to believe her, but we just don't know!

We've all seen Lindsay make terrible decisions before!!

Read the legally challenged lady's most recent tweets and decide for yourself…AFTER THE JUMP!!!

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Bobby Brown's Third DUI Conviction Earns Him 55 Days In The SLAMMER!

Filed under: Legal MattersBusted!Bobby BrownAlcohol

bobby brown sentenced 55 days jail third dui whitney houston no contest

Don't drop the soap, Bobby B. — hygiene is an important part of prison life!!

After pleading no contest to a DUI sustained last October while driving with a suspended license, the notorious Bobby Brown was sentenced today to 55 days in jail!

According to the cops, Whitney Houston's ex-husband drove erratically and his sweet ride reeked of

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Twilight Actor's Piss-Poor Judgement Wins Him Probation & AA Meetings After Urinating In Airport!

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There is an old Volturi saying: "It's better to be pissed off than to be pissed on."

Unfortunately, Bronson Pelletier is part of Team Jacob's pack and a few of Taylor Lautner's boys were never housebroken!!

And so it goes.

Bronson P. — get it?!? — will be forever remembered as the second-tier Twilight star who drunkenly peed on imprinted with the '70s carpeting at LAX, was sentenced by a judge today to two years probation and 52 court-ordered Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.

The actor insisted he was innocent… which is HIGHlarious, considering his shenanigans were caught on camera.

Re-watch the awkward moment where Bronson drunkenly whips out his twi-hard peen and hairy amazeballz to mark his territory at the airport…AFTER THE JUMP!

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Rob Lowe Untouchable No More! Drew Peterson Sentenced To 38 Years In Prison For Murdering His Wife!

Filed under: Legal MattersSad SadRob LoweKaley Cuoco

drew peterson sentenced 38 years kathleen savio first degree murder rob lowe kaley cuoco

Do we sense a Lifetime sequel on the horizon?

Making a final appeal to the court, Drew Peterson screamed:

"I did not kill Kathleen!"

The judge did not believe him.

Convicted last September of murdering ex-wife Kathleen Savio, the ladykiller was sentenced today to 38 years in prison.

Ugh. The whole situation is unfathomably tragic.

Thankfully Drew won't be a threat to any other young women for a long, long time.

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Fat Joe Pleads Guilty To Tax Evasion! Owes The Government A Fortune!

Filed under: Music MinuteLegal Matters

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Uncle Sam is not happy with Fat Joe!!!

The former chart-topper, with rap hits like What's Luv and Make It Rain, has plead guilty to tax evasion this morning a New Jersey courthouse.

Joe came forward after being accused of withholding approximately $700,000 in taxs from 2007 to 2008!!!

He was released on $250,000 bail and will come back for his sentencing in April, which could land him in the slammer for up to 2 years!!!

Looks like Fat's wallet isn't as hefty as his waist anymore!!

[Image via WENN.]

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Melrose Place Actress Convicted Of Vehicular Homicide, Gets Five To 10 Years In Prison

Filed under: TV NewsLegal MattersR.I.P.Sad Sad

amy locane convicted vehicular homicide assault melrose place five ten years prison

Every detail of this situation continues to remain absolutely tragic!

Former Melrose Place star Amy Locane-Bovenizer was convicted this week of vehicular manslaughter and assault with an auto after killing a 60 year-old NJ woman and severely injuring her husband while driving drunk.

The actress was sentenced to five to 10 yeas in prison for the first charge and three-to-five for the second; it's expected she'll be allowed to serve her sentences concurrently.

Amy's blood alcohol level was

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Joe Simpson Gets Off With Probation & Fines!

joe simpson dui sentencing probation fines no jail

No jail for this bird!

Joe Simpson's DUI arrest has ultimately resulted in 36 months of probation, $390 in fines, and a 3-month alcohol program.

So now Jessica Simpson's daddy-o can go back to dealing with all the divorce drama in his life. How thrilling.

Speaking of, do U really think he wanted that males-only modeling agency??

If he did, better late than never… right, Joe??

[Image via Ramey Pix.]

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