In case you missed The Bachelor Monday night, allow us to catch you up: lots of virgin jokes, a bunch of kissing, surprise appearances by Megan Mullally, Nick Offerman, and Billy Eichner, and a tug-of-war-contest.
All caught up on what’s going on? Perfect! Ha!!!
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Seriously, though, last night began the yearly process where producers of The Bachelor place the poor girls in different boxes for the audience — and Demi took front and center stage as the early leader at winning the villain sweepstakes.
To be sure, Demi is no Olivia Caridi from Ben Higgins‘ season (OMG, do y’all remember THAT level of crazy?!), nor can our new girl compare to the sultry Krystal Nielson from last season (we miss your brand of crazy, Krystal! Hope you’re having fun with The Goose!).
But even without taking it to that level, Demi still did the damn thing (sorry, stole your phrase there Becca Kufrin) and it’s got us still thinking about her this morning!!!
In no particular order, here’s where Demi aggressively went after poor Colton Underwood and set herself apart from the rest of the girls on last night’s episode (below):
- When Offerman and Mullally gave Demi her stand-up assignment to tell a “first” story in front of a couple hundred people, she used it as a moment to jump off stage and kiss Colton in front of all the other girls. That did NOT sit well with the women.
- After a little one-on-one time with Colton on that same group date, Demi returned to the main room and — not even kidding — picked up the date rose! WTF?! Party foul, girl! Colton needs to give that thing to you! Even worse, she literally said “oh, it’s my rose” out loud while other girls looked on in disbelief. (In the end, the rose didn’t even go to her, though, so at least justice was partially served.)
- When fellow contestant Tracy finally got a minute to hang with the bachelor, Demi interrupted wearing nothing but a bathrobe, and took Colton to her “fantasy closet.” Umm… she knows he’s a virgin, right?! Also, it’s a hell of a bold move interrupting for MORE alone time together after (a) you’ve already gotten some, and (b) you’re not wearing much of anything. She also spanked Colton with a paddle (hence the picture, above). Naughty woman!
- After returning with Colton from her
sex dungeonfantasy closet, Demi found out Tracy was crying over being interrupted. This did not concern Demi at all, and it was, in her words, “water off my back.” She went on to crap all over the older women vying for Colton’s love this year, saying “the cougar attacks do not get me at all.” Cougar-proof! Shouldn’t we all be so lucky…
Now of COURSE Colton rewarded this behavior with a rose because, hello, it’s The Bachelor and every season needs a villain!!
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Demi — the self-proclaimed woman that hasn’t dated a virgin since she was 12 — is out here trying to pop Colton’s cherry and fight a bunch of cougars… and so far, she’s definitely soaking up most of the attention!
What’s your reaction, Perezcious readers?! What do U think of Demi??
Sound OFF in the comments (below)!!
[Image via ABC/YouTube.]
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