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A Sad Timeline Of Donald Trump's First Month In Office — Complete With GIFs Of Bachelor Contestants Crying!

| Filed under: PolitikDonald TrumpHillary ClintonArnold SchwarzeneggerSad SadBill O'ReillyGIFsThe Bachelor/ette

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We know, it feels like Donald Trump has already been president for YEARS, but believe it or not it's only been ONE MONTH!

In that time (as of this writing), he's signed 23 executive orders and memorandums, been sued more than 60 times, and declared war on the press.

And he's just getting started!

Related: Even Fox News Is Calling Out Trump's Anti-First Amendment Comments

We thought a timeline of Drumpf's first month in office would be a little hard to swallow all at once, so we paired it with the most appropriate spoonful of sugar we could think of.

For our first reality TV star President, we paired his accomplishments travesties with GIFs of The Bachelor contestants crying!

Get the rundown (below):

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Judd Apatow Compares Donald Trump's Presidency To Getting Raped!

| Filed under: PolitikDonald TrumpHillary ClintonJudd ApatowMelania Trump

Judd Apatow is probably going to get some heat for this.

Wow!! It sounds like Judd Apatow crossed a line when dissing Donald Trump!!

During a stand-up show to promote his new HBO series in Los Angeles on Saturday night, the comedian did NOT hold back against the New York native!

Especially not for his opening.

Related: How To Celebrate President's Day & Not Trump!

The Hollywood producer shared how he felt when Drumpf was elected… like "a person about to get raped, but I didn't know how bad it would be."

But then Judd went on to say that now less than a month under the new president it's so much worse:

"I feel like I've just been raped and I just don't know if I'm going to get murdered."

Whoa! Would rape survivors say the same??

He continued to follow up his controversial joke by bashing Trump through the first family as well, saying he "understands" why Melania Trump wouldn't want to move into the White House:

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Chris Christie Says Donald Trump Made Him Order Meatloaf While Dining In The White House!

| Filed under: PolitikDonald TrumpHillary ClintonSad SadFoodMelania Trump

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It's no secret Donald Trump likes to assert his dominance at every turn.

From obnoxiously aggressive handshakes to repetitive claims that he's a tougher president than Hillary Clinton would ever be, it's clear the president is overcompensating for some… shortcomings.

And unsurprisingly, POTUS's power trip extends to belittling his former Republican election rivals turned groveling political worms!

This week, Chris Christie revealed that Trump decided what meal the New Jersey Governor should order when they dined at the White House on Tuesday.

Video: Trump's Ridiculous Press Conference Gets The Late Night Treatment!

While guest-hosting a New York sports talk radio show on Thursday, Christie recalled earlier in the week when he and his wife Mary Pat joined the president for lunch at the White House.

The 54-year-old recounted Trump pointing to the menu and telling people to get whatever they want — then declared that he and Christie were going to have the meatloaf. He explained:

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All Our Nasty Woman Dreams Came True As Hillary Clinton & Kate McKinnon Are Spotted Out In NYC Together — LOOK!

| Filed under: Donald TrumpHillary ClintonAlec BaldwinSaturday Night LiveBestiezAmazingGirl PowerKate McKinnon

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As Donald Trump continues to whine about Alec Baldwin's impression of him on Saturday Night LiveHillary Clinton is totally embracing her comedy-double, Kate McKinnon!

The first female candidate of a major party was spotted this week by Page Six dining at NYC's Orso before heading to watch Glenn Close perform in the Broadway play Sunset Boulevard.

BESTIE GOALS.

Related: Trump Wants You To Know He 'Inherited A Mess'!

Ch-ch-check it out (below)!!

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Donald Trump Wants You To Know He 'Inherited A Mess'! Get The Deets From His Crazy Press Conference!

| Filed under: PolitikDonald TrumpHillary Clinton

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Donald Trump has been a busy boy! So busy, in fact, that we couldn't possibly understand!

The president raved and ranted his way through another press conference on Thursday where he barked out the tracks off his greatest hits album — from the "dishonest media" to Hillary Clinton's "incompetence."

He also made sure everyone knew he "inherited a mess" of a country!

Trump kicked things off by bragging about how productive he has been draining the White House swamp and filling it with toxic billionaire sludge monsters like Rex Tillerson and Betsy DeVos in his cabinet.

Related: Donald's Only Answering Questions From Conservative Outlets?

As for his new Secretary of Labor pick Alexander Acosta, Trump wasn't concerned with congress blocking his nominee this time, simply saying "he'll get there one way or another." Well, that's sort of frightening.

Trump also made sure to mention he was busy bulking up our "depleted" military and would be issuing a new executive action next week to protect the U.S. from all the bad guys like ISIS and drug dealers from Mexico.

But we all know Trump's true enemies were the reporters in the press room — and this time, POTUS really let the dishonest media have it for reporting on FAKE news about the REAL leaks coming out of his administration. Wait, what?

Trump said that despite reports claiming otherwise, his administration

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Donald Trump Uses His Press Conference With Israeli Prime Minister To Talk Michael Flynn's 'Very, Very Unfair' Scandal & Hillary Clinton's 'Terrible Loss'!

| Filed under: PolitikDonald TrumpHillary ClintonIvanka TrumpControversy

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Donald Trump promises we're "going to see a lot of love" in the United States — and he ain't talking about pussy grabbing this time! (We hope…)

The president held a joint press conference with Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu on Wednesday, and he wanted everyone to know he LOVES the Jews, despite a rise of anti-Semitic incidents since his campaign.

When asked by an Israeli reporter about whether his platform encouraged xenophobia, Trump felt the need to remind everyone that he won 306 electoral votes and fostered "tremendous enthusiasm."

Related: Twitter Is Throwing A #TrumpImpeachmentParty!

Yeah… but enthusiasm for what, exactly?

POTUS also reminded the press that his daughter Ivanka Trump, his son-in-law Jared Kushner, and their three children are Jewish. Oh, thanks!

Speaking on the scandal surrounding Michael Flynn — who resigned after admitting to speaking with Russia about lifting U.S. sanctions — Trump said the national security advisor had been treated very unfairly.

Related: Kellyanne Conway No Longer Welcome On Morning Joe!

Blasting intelligence agencies for the "criminal act" of leaking reports to the press, Drumpf only had sympathy for his former adviser — and blamed the recent leaks on (what else?) Democrats covering for Hillary Clinton's "terrible loss."

Starting to sound like a broken record there, Donny. Maybe this has more to do with agencies wanting to expose your love affair with Russia?

Watch the clips (below) to see Trump get defensive over Flynn — and also promise that he's gonna fix racism!

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