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John Waters Explains Hairspray 2 Plot, AKA The Reason Why It Won't Happen!

John Waters wants you to know that he did indeed write an entire sequel to Hairspray, and to prove it he’s dishing with a synopsis!
We have never seen someone put so much effort into not wanting something to get made — so if you DON’T want the sequel to your 1988/2007 movie/musical to ever get made, this is the plot you write for it. It’s a fool-proof plan! LOLz!
Seriously, the term “jumping the shark” was coined for both shows that literally jump sharks and for sequels with SINGING ZITS.
And, don’t get us wrong, we love Mr. Waters, but we have no idea if he’s punkin’ us on this one!
Here’s how Waters explains it:

“I wrote a whole script, but it never happened. But it still could. You never know ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ Hairspray is the gift that keeps on giving.
“You see, Hairspray 2 ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ well, it├óΓé¼Γäós called White Lipstick, really ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ is about when the real sixties hit and [The Corny Collins Show] isn├óΓé¼Γäót popular anymore. It├óΓé¼Γäós the new hip coming in ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ which really happened. So, you know, the black kids want to have their own version of the show now ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ they don├óΓé¼Γäót want to have to share with the white people!
Little Inez kind of turns into Angela Davis. Link has to pretend that he is British to get a singing career kind of going ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ because the Beatles just hit and everyone wanted their kind of music. So, he has these pimples underneath his Beatles haircut because he never washes it, and, so they start singing to him ├óΓé¼ΓÇ£ kind of like the Chipmunks.”

Luckily, he says the music is not written…
Wow, did we really just read THAT as the actual synopsis?? Okay, okay, we think we kind of love it now….
Though, to be honest… if it had Zac Efron returning, we’d show a whole lot more excitement!
[Image via WENN.]

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Jan 24, 2013 07:07am PDT