Here's what Amy's email said
[Image via Instagram.]
Simon Cowell was spotted out on his yacht recently.
He was drifting around the beautiful waters of Saint-Tropez, France with a pretty brunette
Simon, Simon, Simon…
We are disappointed.
Looks like Simon Cowell doesn't know what everyone else knows — smoking is bad for your health!
Jillian Michaels has twice quit the fitness reality show The Biggest Loser — but now she wants back on!
Now, sources close to Brit Brit are already talking about her plans to get back into shape for her judge role.
It's real! It's really real! A source said that Simon Cowell planned on filling her dressing room with prunes and figs, saying:
"He promised to fill her dressing room with them. That’ll make her ‘regular’ now."
Anyway, the source also said:
"Britney has to look picture perfect, even during downtime. Simon has laid down the law – he’s paying for 'superstar Britney' not the 'trailer trash' version she’s occasionally become known as. Her people have promised she will be transformed. She’ll be glammed up, slimmed down and totally focused on the show.
Her diet includes lots of protein and superfoods to helps speed up her metabolism. The plan is to keep her full in between meals with vitamin juices, so she doesn’t get hungry and grab junk food."
We bet she's gonna look ahmayzing!!
She's gonna be the best judge EVER!
[Image via FayesVision/WENN.]
Have you ever thought to yourself, "Just how DOES Simon Cowell stay so young?"
Oh, and the answer is: Money! Lots of money!
All that money is said to buy: six-monthly Botox injections (ouch!), regular colonic irrigation (yep!), intravenous vitamin injections (what?!) AND he will only use black toilet paper (what's the point??)!
That's actually just the start of it! He also eats fresh fruit sent to him by air freight and drinks TWO smoothies a day made from "exotic plants." Also he has tons of massages, chest waxes, wears tooth caps and dies his hair dark dark dark!
That's so crazy! We can't imagine spending that kind of money on delaying the inevitable!
Age with grace, Simon! Ha!
[Image via WENN.]
On Britain's Got Talent there was an amazing ballroom dancing duo.
Oh, and did we mention that one of them was in a wheelchair?
This woman had been in a wheelchair for eight years and
Oh, to be Simon Cowell! Ha!
Check it out — that's a picture of Simon and Zeta Graff relaxing on the luxury yacht called the Slipstream while docked in St. Barts.
He was probably saying something like, "Don't worry, Zeta. We're only docked because my huge stacks of money are blocking the way."
What a terrible problem to have!
[Image via News Pictures/WENN.]