Eight years after the death of her brother, Kristin Cavallari still feels the pain of the loss. Nowadays, though, she looks at it all from a totally new perspective.
Nearly a decade ago the Laguna Beach alum and her family were left shocked after their beloved Michael Cavallari was found dead two weeks after he went missing. His cause of death was ruled as accidental hypothermia after being exposed to freezing temperatures in the Salt Wash area of Utah. It was a huge heartbreak for Kristin especially, who was very close with her brother. But now she’s finally made “peace” with it.
In her newest Let’s Be Honest podcast episode which premiered on Tuesday, the 37-year-old said her brother’s passing opened her up to a new “spiritual journey”:
“My brother died eight years ago, and him dying really started my spiritual journey, and it really made me question everything in life — what are we doing here? What is the point? Where do we go when we die. And I got a ton of signs from my brother — it made me think that it’s not the end when we die. I know it’s not.”
She went on to reveal she tried the psychedelic drug Bufo to help ease her mind and open her up to new possibilities while she dealt with the grief of her loss:
“What Bufo did, is it opened up my mind to the idea that there are other realms, there are other dimensions, there are other places that we go.”
According to Encyclopedia Britannica, the indole hallucinogen — full name Bufotenine — is capable of blocking the action of serotonin, which is the indole amine transmitter of nerve impulses. Bufotenine can be found in normal brain tissue — and, if you’ve ever heard of the Bufo toad — it can be found in that genus of amphibians, too.
Related: Kristin Fires Back At Fans Criticizing Her For Dating 24-Year-Old TikToker!
The former reality star went on to share some of the experiences she and her parents have had regarding Michael sending them “signs” — and they’re pretty amazing, even without psychedelic enhancement. She recalled “gold coins” being a big factor ever since his memorial service:
“The signs that I’ve gotten from my brother are gold coins. When my brother passed, my mom, my dad and I all saw this medium out in L.A. and she said that Mike, my brother, wanted gold coins at this ceremony that we had for him. Then we started getting gold coins in the craziest places. The craziest places. One for me was, I bought a new makeup bag. Brand new, I had never used it. And I went to Charleston. And when I was in Charleston, I found a gold, European coin, and at the time, I was like, ‘I haven’t been to Europe in years, and years,’ and it was brand new, it had never been used.”
Aww, sounds like her bro is keeping in touch from the other side!
Kristin said these experiences have given her a lot of “peace”, and now she’s more comfortable with the idea of death than she’s ever been:
“So stuff like that, you can’t tell me it’s not a sign — and between my mom, my dad and I, we just had a ton. Which I love. I just find so much peace in that. It just makes me feel like, A) he’s OK. I know that I’ll see him again, and that makes me really happy, and it just gives me a lot of peace … I just really think that we will all see each other again when we die. And you know what, even if we don’t fine. If that’s the faith that I wanna have that makes me happy, then that’s what I’m gonna choose to believe.”
The former MTV star even recounted a dream she had in which her brother connected with her “soul” right after he died:
“I had this dream the first week that they found his body. And the medium that was saw in LA, she was in this dream and she opened up my arms and my brother was right there. In my dream, I was hugging my brother and I woke up bawling crying. But it was not a normal dream, I know in my soul I was hugging my brother. I know. I know that I was. This was was a very different dream. Especially because that’s all I want to do. That’s all I want to do is give him one last hug, and I was able to.”
This dream is what led her to believe we have more than one life — and that she’ll “see him again” one day:
“Mike is good. We know Mike is good because we’ve gotten all these signs. He’s no longer hurting and in pain, so I’ll see him again. I know I’ll see him again and we’ll have many lives together. And so this is just this time period right now without him.”
See her full explanation (below):
We’re so glad to hear Kristin has found so much peace and comfort since that tragedy. We hope she continues to heal and move forward from here.
Thoughts, Perezcious readers?
[Image via Grand County Utah Sheriff’s Office/Let’s Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari/YouTube]