Stephen “tWitch” Boss‘ mom is opening up for the first time since her son’s tragic death.
As we previously reported, the 40-year-old dancer and The Ellen DeGeneres Show DJ died by suicide in December, just weeks before Christmas. Most recently, his autopsy report revealed the heartbreaking news that he had no drugs or alcohol in his system at the time he died from a self-inflicted gunshot wound. So, so sad…
Related: Famous TikTok Dad Bobby Moudy Dies By Suicide
Now, on Wednesday, his mom is ready to share her final messages regarding her beloved son. While speaking with People, Connie Boss Alexander took a look back at tWitch’s life — and how things have changed since his death:
“Sometimes it feels like it was just yesterday, and then other times it feels like it’s been so long since I’ve seen him.”
The 59-year-old went on to say, though, that she finds peace in knowing this isn’t the end:
“When I think about him, I try not to dwell on how he left this earth. This is not totally the end. That is where my peace comes from.”
Connie revealed that the last time she spoke with her son was the day before he died — and even in that moment, he was so selfless and caring — which made his passing even more of a shock. Discussing his final messages to her, she recalled:
“I’d been sick, so he texted to ask how I was feeling. That was the last time we talked. To the extent that Stephen may have been in a Black depression — no, not Stephen. He was so in tune with analyzing and trying to make himself better, reading self-help books, so this came as a complete shock.”
Even after she heard the news of his death, the grandmother says she never expected his passing to go the way it did:
“[Death by suicide] was not my first thought — that it had been his hand. I really thought something had happened to him.”
Thinking back to December 13, that tragic day, Connie said she just knew something terrible had happened. While waiting to get a rapid COVID test, she felt her anxiety kick in:
“I immediately started placing calls to see if anyone had seen or spoken with him. Finding that nobody had, my brother and I bought plane tickets. … And my brother called to ask where I was. Then my sister-in-law called: ‘Hey, we’re just checking on where you are.’ In the pit of my stomach, I knew something was wrong,”
The moment she found out tWitch was gone is a complete “blur” to her now:
“I went to my parents’ house and walked in. They were just standing there looking at me, and I said, ‘Have you heard something?’ All I remember hearing was, ‘Connie, he’s gone.’ And I remember screaming or falling to my knees. The rest of the day is more of a blur.”
Just gut-wrenching. The pain of a mother losing her son is something indescribable…
Incredibly, though, Connie has found peace amid all her heartbreak — and she knows her boy is alright on the other side:
“You find yourself in a lot of introspection, a lot of looking back. ‘Did I miss something? Did he mean something when he said this?’ At this point, I’m in realization, I guess. When I wake up in the morning, it does hit me that, ‘oh my God, he really is not physically here.’ But then in my head I can hear him say, ‘Hey, Mom. I’m OK.'”
As for her last texts she exchanged with tWitch? She always holding tight to those final words:
“He started that last text with, “I love you, Mom,’ And I responded, ‘I love you more.'”
Tear-jerking! What a treasure for her to have in those low moments…
Our hearts continue to be with the Boss family and their loved ones. Stephen’s legacy will surely inspire and touch so many for years to come.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, help is available. Consider contacting the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, by calling, texting, or chatting, or go to 988lifeline.org.
[Image via Connie Boss Alexander/Instagram]
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