What Jennifer Lopez Thinks 'Destroyed' Her First Relationship With Ben Affleck 'From The Inside Out'

Nearly two decades later, Bennifer may still be a bit haunted by their past.

Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck have never been shy about condemning the overwhelming media attention during their first engagement. In fact, they specifically blamed the paparazzi after calling off their wedding back in 2004. Now that they’re back together, they’ve continued to point fingers at the press, with Ben saying it was about “50 percent” of what ended their relationship.

In a new interview for Rolling Stone, his lady agreed. J.Lo recalled:

“It was brutal. It was brutal. It’s one of those things that you bury very deeply so you can move on and get about your business. …. It’s funny because Ben and I were together, and we were so in love. It was one of the happiest times of my life. But also, there was this other thing happening where we were being criticized, and it really destroyed our relationship from the inside out, because we were just too young to understand at that time what were really the most important things in life.”

This has definitely been the narrative J.Lo has held to when discussing the early breakup, but it’s kiiiinda ignoring the other Bennifer of it all.

Affleck has opened up in the past about how he and Jennifer Garner fell in love while filming Daredevil — and that happened while he and Lopez were still together. So blaming media scrutiny doesn’t really feel like the whole truth. If anything it feels like it’s letting Ben off the hook. And if that’s what J.Lo has to do to be happy, who are we to stand in the way, right?

And she is happy. The Hustlers star told Rolling Stone that she’s now “really happy, probably more than I’ve even been in my whole life,” but she was also “trying not to say too much” about her rekindled romance. Asked about their current relationship status directly, she deferred:

“I won’t talk about it a lot. We’ve both grown. We’re the same, and we’re different. And that’s what’s nice.”

Pushed further, she would only say:

“Yeah … having a second chance at real love … yeah. Like I said, we learned a lot. We know what’s real, what’s not real. So it’s just — the game has changed. Again, I’m trying not to say too much.”

She was willing to speak on her own journey of growth, though.

The 52-year-old reflected a lot on love, noting that it was her parents’ relationship (which eventually ended in divorce) that taught her first lesson on love, rather than her own “first love.” That said, she still feels fondness for her first love, David Cruz, who passed away in 2020. After his death, the singer “realized that she still remembered his home number by heart” and called his mother. She shared:

“I was like, ‘Hi. It’s Jennifer Lopez,’ and she was like, ‘Jennifer…’ I said, ‘I’m so sorry,’ and she started crying. I was like, ‘You know I loved David.’ She was like, ‘I know. He loved you, too. He always loved you.’ … You get lucky, you have a first love like that.”

So sweet.

Now, it seems that one of her early loves, Ben, may very well be her last love! Despite keeping so tight-lipped about their romance throughout the interview, she did admit that she “does not foresee another public breakup” with the actor. She dished:

“I don’t think we would have got back together if we thought that was where it was headed. We feel like what we found again is so much more important, and how we protect that and how we live our lives — what to share, what not to share — is the balance that we have now, the benefit of experience and the wisdom that we gained over the years.”

OMG, So all those imminent engagement rumors are probably true! We love seeing Bennifer get their happy ending!

[Image via NBC/YouTube & WENN]